A blessing for you on this summer solstice

A Blessing

I bless you for all the ways you woke my heart,
and I bless the passion that was there from the start.

For the hope that I found through every confession,
I bless you for showing me what it meant to be known.

I bless your smile that has lit up my soul,
and as you share it with the world,
may it shine brighter still.

I bless your mind,
always curious,
ever hungry,
for it taught me to think and dream and wonder
beyond my programming,
beyond my boundaries.

I bless your flip-flops,
your fury unedited,
for they showed both your strengths and your weaknesses,
and your fearless transparency in the face of disappointment.
I learned so much about your heart,
whether I dodged or stood resolute
in your line of fire.

I bless your fire and your flame,
for I learned what warmth and wound could feel like.
You light up the darkness in a magical way,
and though you shine so big and so bright,
it is your humility and hospitality that draws us ever near

to follow,

to gather,

and to revel in your illuminated presence.

I bless your kiss and your touch.
Heaven does not come close
to describing the feeling of being loved by you.
The sacred scars on my heart are evidence of the great healing I’ve found
because of your affection.

I bless your drive,
your ambition,
and your dreams.
You do not seem to understand
What the word impossible means. 
You leave the world,
and all of us in it,
better than you found us,
teaching us to lift our own voices,
connected and growing,
ever reflecting the leader you see in the mirror.

I bless your boys.
I pray for them by name.

I bless them to grow
into the remarkable men God gave you to raise.

I bless you to teach them
and challenge them
and push them
and love them fully.

They have no idea what a wealth
of smoothies and drumsticks,
overnight oats and movie-night cuddles,
Reiki and laughter,
wisdom and wonder,
and a courageous example of beauty
they have been richly given.

I bless the constellation, Bright Fame,
the one you named for me on my birthday,
a gift you so graciously gave.

I bless it to shine brightly
and to keep watch above us still.

May it remind you that some lights remain,
even when they are separated by distance,
season,
or circumstance.

And whenever you find yourself looking heavenward,
may its quiet brilliance remind you
that your own light has illuminated more lives
than you will ever know.

I bless you to love,
and to know that not a single day
will diminish my love for you.

I bless you to sing
and fill the world with your melody.

I bless you to savor a martini
and good red wine,
to cook and dance,
and to be deliberate
about peanut butter in your purse.

I bless you to wonder,
to trust,
and to feel the gratitude
that rises in my chest
whenever I say your name.

I bless you to cry if you ever need to,
and to know that you were never too much.

I bless you to read,
always curious,
as much of each book as you want to.

I bless you to look to the moon
and know for certain
that no matter where you are,
I still search those same heavens
and still pray beneath those same stars.

And lastly,

I bless you to hold tight
to the red thread of who you really are;

a true sovereign beauty,

a violet light,

a queen resplendent,

both lioness and llama,

a wildflower,

a noble force,

a dream and a prize,

and surely… a star.

Trusting

Not for a moment could I ever pretend that my thoughts and heart and mind are not filled with your smile.

Not even if I rewrote our story with tragedy in the end,

could the depth and truth and gift of our love ever be held in denial.

For you are, and have always been, 

the love of all my lifetimes.

This is not a response or a rebuff,

but rather a poetic truth in this deliberate space.

The honesty of my heart today is that I am working to remember who I am,

though I know this season of my healing is far from over.

And I miss you more than poetry could explain , but I love you more than to reopen our wounded pain. 

For God used you to wake my soul.

And yes, it’s true…

I became tangled,

blurring the worship between the love and the lover.

But never will I curse or regret,

nor seek apologies or forgiveness

for what was born in my heart through each sacred moment,

save for the pain that stung us all,

and the tears I could not comfort.

I stood beneath that same full blue moon,

hand to heart,

true love in my chest.

I prayed to God for your highest good,

and willed beauty for your soul with my highest best.

Without desire to own.

Without anxiety to possess.

Without anger for what I cannot control.

Only peace.

Only grace.

Only trust.

For you to flourish.

For you to shine.

Begging God to reveal 

the intentions of this true, though silent, love.

My memories are haunted,

but my heart is at peace.

For I am learning that the most loving thing I can give

is an open-handed release.

And so I will trust the love.

And I will silence the fear.

I will trust the Author with the pages still unwritten,

though the story, to me, is still unclear.

I am utterly undone,

and wholly transformed,

by the divine encounter

across from a charcuterie board.

I still listen for the hawks,

and bless you each time I see a butterfly.

And through a quiet, surrendered kind of love,

my heart is becoming more alive.

Deeply and truly,

no two words could ever be more true.

Hopefully it’s not Gatsby.

Maybe it’s Pride and Prejudice.

Perhaps it’s an ending of its own, ever new.

The gift of your heart.

The mercy of our growth.

The twin flames of our passion.

The grief in all our goodbyes.

The grace in both of our open hands

They still conjure whispered prayers

on moonlit nights .